Friday, March 5, 2010

March 5

Best part of the day: Sitting with Maggie while she ate dinner. I worked on a puzzle, she worked on her food and we sang songs and made silly noises. It was quite fun. It's funny how hard and stressful and tiring and (sometimes) boring parenting is and yet I look back and feel mostly joy. Not that I'm complaining.

Another really good moment: This morning I way overslept, so I asked R to get up and get Maggie ready. I said, "I'll love you forever," and he said, "You already will," and I said, "No but I will if you help me." He did get up and get Maggie ready. I asked if was going to put her in the car and he said it was too cold (he was still in his manties). Then he asked if I would still love him forever even if he didn't put Maggie in the car. Of course I will.

Worst part of the day: My annoying student. I have one that just drives me batty. He is so immature and when you are 10 and immature it's like having a freaking 4 year old. A whiny, spoiled 4 year old. Some days it's so hard to deal with him. Today was one of those days.

Maggie moment: Oh, watching her walk around the playground. She couldn't quite keep up with the other kids (they were all older). It breaks my heart. I know she's not sad about it and it's just that she's so little. But it just kills me. Watching her try (sorta successfully) to play with two little girls, I thought I was gonna throw up. I know that sounds dramastic but it's all happening so fast and what if she gets bullied or her feelings get hurt or no one wants to play with her. I'm going to cry. Because all those things will happen most likely. It's a vulnerability like nothing I have experienced because no matter what I can't (and probably shouldn't) protect her from it all. Oh, but I want to. I really, really want to.

Gratitude: I know, I know but Maggie. I'm just so grateful for her. I feel like I won the freaking lottery.

That I got more yarn. I finished my last blanket last weekend and every evening I sit down to read blogs and reach for my knitting and there's nothing there. I finally remembered that I need to buy yarn at a time when it's useful to remember that and bought some blue and green yarn. I love knitting.

No comments: